Monday, February 18, 2008

Windows to the soul...

Well, I was inspired by my sister's post to compare my kids' eyes. I know the pictures are a little big, and maybe slightly creepy, but it was the best way to see them.

Here is Sierra's eye color. She has always had big round eyes, and insanely long eyelashes. She ended up with Jason's eye color. Kind of a grayish-blue, with brown in the middle.Here is Tyner's eye color. Pretty much exactly the same color as Sierra's. Jay must have strong genes.Here are Zeker's eyes. Right now they are a really dark blue. There's no telling what color they will end up being. Probably just like Sierra and Tyner's. I've always wanted at least one dark-brown haired, brown eyed child. Don't think that's gonna' happen with this one...
And just for fun, here is my eye color. Kind of a greenish-brown with brown in the middle. Notice the scar in my eyebrow? That's all that left from my fall on the ice.

And, in other news. The kids and I are heading back to Washington in about a month. For two whole weeks. I'm actually taking the kids out of school for a whole week before their spring break even starts. I'm so freakin' excited, I can't even begin to describe it. I have been soooo homesick lately, it's not funny. I'm not sure if this trip home will be good for that or not. It will either make me appreciate the little community I live in, or it will remind me of all I'm missing not living in Washington.

I really miss all the convenience of living in a place like Bremerton. The large variety of stores close by, the lower prices of things like groceries and gas, the many opportunities for kid's activities, the higher paying jobs. But the thing I really miss the most is my family. I'm getting teary here, so I probably won't write too much about this. My sister Dani just moved back to Bremerton with her three kids (her husband will follow soon). I am so incredibly jealous of her. I miss seeing my sister's all the time. Calling them up, and just hanging out with them. Scrapbooking once a month. Going on payday Walmart trips. I miss watching TV with my dad, and hanging out with my mom in her sewing room. I miss family dinners, where we all throw napkins at each other when we're done eating. I miss the noise, the fights, the laughing, the jokes.

My sister Kim has been away from home much longer than I have (six years, at least), and I can't even imagine. We moved down here to NoCal about five years ago, and lived here for a year and eight months. Then we moved back to Washington for two years. Then, for some reason, I convinced my husband that we should move back here. We've been here for a year and five months now. I'm not sure why I wanted to move down here. I think when you visit, you get so caught up in the relaxed atmosphere, and seeing friends again, that you don't think about the realities of day to day life. About the low paying jobs, about the high-priced grocery store, the insane gas prices, or about WalMart being half an hour away. You don't think about the fact that the only extra-curricular activities for your children are one month of tee-ball in the spring, one month of soccer in the fall, and two weeks of swimming in the summer. If you want anything like dance or gymnastics or anything else, you have to drive half an hour to Yreka. I know I should be happy where God has planted me. Living here has been incredibly good for my husband. He has made some incredible friends, he really likes his job, he loves that he is so close to hunting and fishing. About the only thing I've heard him say he misses about Washington is playing softball. But he has his whole family here, unlike me.

But, I digress. My husband wants us to stay here, so I need to get my heart to a place of acceptance about that. He is the head of our home, and I need to follow his lead. I need to not let myself get caught up in depression about this. I need to remind myself daily that we are where God wants us. There are some good things about living here. Being close to Jay's grandparents, good schools, a good church, an awesome group of friends. God has certainly blessed us in our life here. So, I'm going to stop wallowing in self-pity. And I'm going to go take a shower, while my kids are outside playing and the baby's sleeping.

Sorry for griping.

3 comments:

Kimi said...

Okay, I started crying when I read the part about throwing napkins. Such a sap! We should have just married some guys from the area, yeah right?! I hate being so far away but I love my man. Wouldn't trade him fer nuthin'.
I can't wait to see you guys. Your kids have some pretty eyes. Funny, I always wanted a light eyed child, I don't really care about the hair so much. Should I have done my pics closer? Can you see their eyes ok in mine?
Alright, I need to try and shower while Joey is sleeping. Talk to you later.

ScrapFairy said...

ahhh I miss you guys, can't wiat for you guys to get here either. I know it is hard being so far, but you are probably in a good place I just wish it was easier for you. We will just make our scrap get aways closer so you can come hang with us more often.

Danielle Hope said...

Neat post! Your eye is healing really well. I can't wait to see you guys on Thursday for Bible Study.